blog dated 11/25/06

11/25/06

SENIOR SELF-RESPECT, SANITY, SURVIVAL-or SUBMISSION

By Richard Tuniewicz

Many senior citizens have spent their whole life in the process of determining their priorities, at various segments of their lives. Unfortunately, many do not concern themselves with what is involved in the planning of basic self-respect, sanity or survival in daily life.

After the age of reason (about 7 years old), priorities have to do with toys/hobbies, snacks, school, family and money. Secondary interests have to do with peers, peer groups, teachers, and rivals for the affection of family and friends.

As we get older we are exposed to various people, and environments, which challenge our natural abilities to cope and adapt to the changes with which we are confronted. The methods which we use, and the reasons that we use them, result from what we see other people do in their ‘normal’ everyday life. Putting together this variety of observed coping methods, and selecting some of them for our own use, allows us to deal with adverse conditions in what is considered a ‘normal’ manner. If we put together unique coping methods which are ‘original’, people not previously exposed to the ‘action’, are sometime left awed or uncomfortable. These ‘unusual coping methods are actually not very different, they are only variations, and adaptation of what everyone, or at least some, other people are doing, or use to accomplish their objectives.

As we go through life, we find that societal pressures and influences, have what is probably the greatest effect on our reflective actions and reflexive reactions. This results in people, who are mostly ‘followers’ , usually always reacting virtually, in the same way.

When a person is less inclined to be a ‘follower’ , he is more likely to combine coping actions, or use them in creative, but effective ways, which he develops with ‘trial and error’ methods or reading about creative (fiction or non-fiction) and different uses of coping actions. These can vary from intellectual to physical methods. (Outsmarting, silence, verbal comments, retorts, limited violence, body language, or combinations of any or all.) We learn a lot of our natural responses from animals who do more posturing than attacking. Some animals posture, and, use short, painfully limited attacks to drive home their sincerity or emphasis. Most humans attempt to be more subtle, primarily because of society’s supposed strict aversion to it’s members control, or abuse, of each other through physical violence.

People who are so disposed, as to verbally or physically attack, either instinctively, or reflectively, are usually considered mentally ill, are treated as societal outcasts., and are to some degree shunnenned and discriminated against. The are very few "rugged individualists" surviving in today’s regular society.

More and more probate...( easy adult guardianship facilitation)... laws are being developed to discriminate against, and control our elder citizens, who have survived to senior status, and adapted to their environments with sixty year old methods. The coping methods of yesteryear, are not methods with which many modern day citizens are comfortable. Many modern day citizens, who have been spoon fed much of their livelihood, who have not been exposed to the actual dangers of war, loss of life, or denial of their liberties, are quick to deny others of their liberties. If there is even the mildest presumption of any type of threat, these individuals, (who have grown up in a relatively cowardly social atmosphere), are usually the same people who opt away, from the social wartime responsibility of fighting for freedom, their neighbors, friends, country, or themselves.

The roots of these cowardly, discriminatory attitudes can be found in the preambles, constitutions, platforms and foundations of anarchist political organizations like the Libertarians, and to some extent, their cousins, the Republicans.

Self-Respect

Every person has the right, and usually the desire, to create a dignified image of himself. In order for that image to be more than an aspect of his imagination, there are things that must be done to live up to one’s own image

One way to create and maintain a realistic image is to decide what you want to accomplish, and how you would like to be perceived, by yourself, and others. Sometimes YOU have to make a choice, or differentiation, whether your perception is indeed, the same, different, or more important, than the perception of others. The answers to these questions are not always clear or cut-and-dried. Since different persons can have different perceptions of the same reality, there can be a dillema when deciding whether you want to be a person that you yourself can respect, or is your motivation primarily the respect, and approval, of certain broad, or narrow segments of peerage and society. Societal acceptance has a greater impact on many peoples actions than actual integrity. This is made obvious by many rules and laws, which, in practice, are made to be deferential to the holders of wealth and power, rather than sympathetic to "everyman", or the poor and powerless.

The old adage "others do not always see us as we see ourselves", is very true, but should be compared to the other believable cliche, that " no one knows us better than we know ourselves".

 

Where do we get alternate views, or perception of ourselves? Probably from our idols and role models with which we come into contact on our developmental, intellectual and physical growing years. The process evolves our views, with our own exposure, to new and different behaviors, compared to tried and familiar ones. The result of different behaviors, are sometimes interesting, and not unpleasant. In any case, they are definitely, not boring, and are often stimulating.

In our final analysis, of our own self-respect, do we choose to be wealthy and powerful "villains"? Or do we consider the high ground to be peace at any cost, "gentle souls"? For most of us, we are somewhere in between, with a variety beyond evaluation.

Sanity

The modern day perception of senior citizens is in many cases an unfair one to say the least. In many jurisdictions, the elder citizen is deffered to because of age, complete with condescending adittudes and discriminatory laws and social stigma. Unfair probate and adult guardianship laws are rampant. Assignments of attorneys and guardians ad lidem by judges are in many cases contrived to protect the best interest of the judicial system, rather than the "best interest" of the wards or ward candidate.

With the legal and societal "deck" stacked against them, it is no wonder that our elderly "victims" of unfair guardianships, who are unfairly and unreasonably institutionalized, give up all hope, and fall into malaise, depression, deeper illnesses, and eventually die an obscure, premature "nursing home death".

Written off by selfish, self indulgent family, which represent a society which acts in the similar fashion. They create the image of the benevolent ones who take the trouble of dropping their parent off at a nursing home, to "live", but more likely, "to die". The elderly are not fooled by this facade of benign love. These "life-experienced" seniors, know rejection and selfishness, when it affects them so personally, and tragically. For many, it is just too much to bear. They decay physically and emotionally, in the locked, institutional human warehouses of human denigration, referred to as "nursing" homes.

Here again a great charade of helping the ill and helpless, while in actuality, the policies are made to promote the interest of staff, management and stockholders. Rules are made and enforced or not, with not the primary care and improvement of the patient in mind, but for the convenience of the bureaucratic staff. Examples of this are in unwritten policies, practices and procedures, which include planned and unplanned dehydration of residents, the gradual de-nourishment of the residents, through planned insufficiency of calories, because of the inherent super-sedentary lifestyle of the average nursing home resident. This planned deprivation of "regularly scheduled daily exercise", is a main reason for the prevalence of "ineffective" or "marginal" regimens for diabetics, as well as other diseases affecting the brain tissues. In addition, the brain is composed of 90% water, so it is no wonder that nursing home life is so debilitating to the elderly. An average of 30% of the elderly in nursing homes are clinically dehydrated. Another 30% are in a state of borderline malnutrition, if not actually starving, because of the inconsistent and poor quality of the food. With the average nursing home receiving about $8000/month for care and treatment, there is no logical explanation for such nursing home deficiencies, and the resultant effect, on the health and sanity of the residents. The main reason (excuse)for many nursing home deficiencies are the lack of sufficient overworked and underpaid staff, to keep the patients properly cared for.

Treating senior citizens to "activities" of a two to five year old child, should not be acknowledged as "appropriate", senior care. It is no wonder that our elder members, are sometimes prematurely considered "demented" or "irrational" . "Care providers" are quick to diagnose differences of opinion with elders, as symptoms of "mental illness" especially when the "homes" employ a multitude of self serving, social workers, as analysts and therapists, none of whom are in the business of serving the interest of the patients. An in depth discussion with many of them will reveal that they are there in the final analysis, to protect the best interest of their employer, and they are not the advocates, of the elderly, sick, frail and powerless resident. The best interest of the nursing homes are best served if the residents are kept sick enough to continue their residence at the nursing homes indefinitely.

In effect, this leaves the elderly with no real and functional advocate, while they are a nursing home confinee. Even the so called "Ombudsmen", have little or no power to protect the elderly from emotional and physical abuse, mistreatment, poor nursing practice, staff lying and exaggerating about conditions,and treatments. State laws and protective legislation are written to protect the best interest of the bureaucratic "caretakers", who, if they deny that a residents’ "complaint", ever happened, are afforded protection from any action by the state. In any case, the laws of confidentiality mean that the accused "caretaker", or nurse provider, will not have their name mentioned in any report or decision handed down by the state investigator. This severely retards any attempt at the average resident to receive just treatment when there are complaints to be made about medications, treatments, emotional abuse, insensitivity, etc. Whether it is true, or a lie, whatever is written on a patients’ chart is the only record that an investigator can go by. In many cases which I have seen, lies and exaggeration abound on the chart. Not only that, but most positive aspects of the patients condition are eliminated from mention, so the investigator only hears and sees the worst possible interpretation of the record. If the resident is fortunate enough to get equal time with the investigator, then it is possible that he could discredit an improper and lying nursing statement. However, this is not usually the case due to time constraints of the investigator, and probably everyone knows its just going through the motions, and is a waste of time anyway.

Diagnoses abound, which are Improper, wrong, and some, right or wrong, current or historical, are carried on the patients’ records, as current, and mistakenly considered to be relevant. The system of case investigation is laden with exaggerated and false information from almost everyone, but, the patient. I perceive that almost anyone from a lowly CNA, to the nursing home administrator, (who has almost no contact with the resident), can add more weight to the investigation, or Guardian ad Lidem’s report than a statement by the resident himself. Why should this be the case? Is it so apparent that I just cannot see it when it is right in front of me? Or maybe it is as my detractors would have me believe, that I’m Psychotic, and am imagining everything?

I don’t think so. ! ! !

 

NEXT BLOG:

Senior Survival;

OR SUBMISSION-(and Death)